Office Mysteries – Solved

Work went well again this week. The women in the office tried to get their boss to hire me part-time, but he isn’t convinced my presence is totally necessary. As flattered as I was they wanted to keep me, I’m kinda relieved he didn’t go for it. So, I’m free again for another week and will go back there to help again the week after that.

Between mad filing, reorganization, and scanning documents, I managed to solve 3 office mysteries. These mysteries took up enormous amounts of brain power for whole days at a time.  I just couldn’t let them go unsolved!

Mystery #1 – Is the person in the corner office a woman or a man?

This one was not easy folks. All day Tuesday, I was absolutely sure I’d figured it out – man.

Then I tried to hard to stay away from that office because I thought he must surely think I had a crush on him for all the sneaky looks I’d been giving him. But then, on Wednesday I noticed his pants. He was wearing a very manly suit, but the pants had a tapered leg. Wait a minute! Men don’t wear tapered legs!!

Then, finally, I spied a name plate in the office. Woman. Definitely woman. I guess it really was the name plate that solved the mystery, but I think the tapered legs gave it all away.

2. The Use of Email

Those of you who work in an office know, many folks use email for nearly every type of communication and this makes sense. Especially in a cubical type situation. Who wants to listen to every conversation every one in the office needs to have? So, most people quietly email each other…

1. Do you have such and such document?

2. Can I borrow your stapler?’

3. Please file the stack of papers on my desk after lunch.

Now, all these conversations might be happening with someone sitting right next to you. But still, we email away.

However, SOME people in the office do not take part in this solemn and respectful way of communication and you are forced to listen to them make plans, and ask questions, and borrow staplers. AND, they won’t answer your emails because they would prefer you just come talk to them.

The mystery is – being new in the office, who likes email and who likes face to face??? Only time and trial and effort can solve this one. I admit, I only partially solved this one.

3. Cell phones

Everyone in the office has them. We are all connected to families. Many of us have kids. We have doctors appointments to make and cancel. All of us have text loving hubbies and kids? Right? Right??

Well, I never saw a single cell phone being used, ever. It was like the entire office shed any links to the outside world at the door. Well, what is a girl to do? I couldn’t ignore Ben’s questions via text? He HAD to know where the paper plates, extra sheets, and tax forms were! So, here’s how I solved this one!

Text in the bathroom stall! Mystery solved!

And on a more serious note, thanks to all of you who have prayed for our family while we go through this little season. I know it has only gone as well as it has because of that. Thank you!!

Planned posts for next week:

1. Reflections on our participation in a small group

2. Thoughts on the servanthood study we are doing as a small group

3. Thoughts on the software our church uses to organize the small groups and keep us all connected virtually.

4. Thoughts on doing “big church” well.

5. Donuts. Why they should become the bottom layer of the food pyramid.

Dear Mom…

because I know you read this…

1. Thank you for the Valentine’s M&M’s and the Dove dark chocolate.

2. Thank you for working so hard and always having $10 in your purse on Fridays so I could go play with friends.

3. Thank you for taking me to piano each week.

4. Thank you for all the swim lessons, swim suits, swim meets, goggles, etc.

5. Thank you for the Jeep Islander which catapulted me from “nice girl” to “popular beyond imagination.”

6. Thank you for not making fun of me in all the terrible plays and musicals I was in.

7. Thank you for taking me to Statford Square and Fox Valley Mall countless times.

and one more thing Mom…

I love you.  Mean it.

Leave a comment Mom. I DARE YOU!!!

Thumbs up

Two thumbs up for this wonderful book. Waaaaaay up. I’m trying to break my very bad habit of skipping books that have anything to do with boys. Boy, have I been missing out.

Worth by A. Lafaye, is  Nathaniel’s story, set in rural Nebraska, 1870. After a tragic accident leaves him unable to help his pa around the farm, the family takes in an orphaned boy named John. The family’s struggle to move on and not completely sink beneath their load of cares is epic and heart wrenching – and caught in the middle of the chaos are these two boys, locked in a battle to become the “beloved” son.

Despite holding many, many charms for boys, there was certainly a lot there for me too, especially the emotional undercurrent revealed by each character and the healing the family experiences.

I’m not honestly sure if a “boy” will like it, now that I think about it. Written by a woman, she does perhaps, bring to the front of the story the emotional plane these pre-teen boys are experiencing too much. She probably should have added one or two more chapters about wrestling, riding bareback across the farm to catch a barbwire fence cutter, or maybe something about hunting. I don’t know…

As a mother of a son, it was a very good read. I cried twice. I cried because there is something so raw about a boy experiencing pain. When I read about young girls going through strife, it makes me sad, but I don’t ache and die and go all to pieces in the same way. Two boys, two tragedies, two painful, choked up sessions of tearful page turning.

For reading aloud, may I suggest, Mary Poppins and Mary Poppins Comes Back. But – you have to read it with accents, a very dry, sarcastic tone, and lots of sound effects – especially grumpy huffs, stuck-up snorts, and weary sighs.  If you try to read it without these things,  it will all be rather odd and boring.

For reading with a little one, how about Beware of the Frog, by William Bee.

Hilarious and very fun to read. You’ll need a few sound effects in hand for this one too, but boy, the ending is worth every bit of effort. We have checked it out now 7 times. 7!!

My next review will probably be about another “boy” book, as I’m on a bit of mission to scope out the best there is for my soon to be ravenous reader, T6. Any suggestions?

Baby Showers

Do you enjoy baby showers? I do. I really do. If you invite me to yours, I promise not to sit in the corner with other “older” moms who like to snicker and smirk about how naive you are about “birth plans,” or “getting your baby on a schedule” or “discipline techniques for 1 month olds.” I promise to joyful dote on you, fill up your plate with goodies, be genuinely overjoyed when the baby kicks or I see a crazy elbow race across your belly.

I will buy you whatever is on YOUR registry, and not fill up an ancient looking gift bag with diapers. I will want to touch and feel each and every outfit and admire each and every little snap and embroidered bunny rabbit when it comes around the circle of women gathered to watch you open your gifts. I will happily eat any flavor of baby food for any game you would enjoy and I promise not to spit out the spinach or sweet potatoes which someone always thinks is funny to throw in the mix.

I will however, slip in a little something special along side the cutest outfit ever, and I hope you will just take my word for it. These are mandatory for new mommies, and no one will be brave enough to give them to you.

1. New retainer case

    My teeth were perfectly straight when I got married and had been for many, many years thanks to my parents and 2 sets of braces. I had not worn my retainer for so long, I wouldn’t have known where to look for it. But, with each kid, my bottom teeth got just a little bit more out of whack. Three kids later they are a mess. It must have something to do with hormone changes. So, I’ll try to find you a lovely, flowery, easy to spot, case to help you remember to slip that ol’ retainer on now and again.

2. Mouth guard

    Yes, just like the ones football players wear. Both of my top front teeth have lovely little chips in them from various toddler heads. (Yes, I am a mad tickler, wrestler, kind of mommy – but I think every mommy winds up with a kid’s head in their face coming at them 100 miles per hour at some point.) I suggest wearing it when you think any sort of tumbling around is about to occur. I wish there was a more attractive way to protect your nose too, because I can’t tell you how painful it is to get cracked in the nose by a little one’s head, but I’ll spare you. Just pop in that mouth guard when you think to and enjoy yourself.

4. Crest white strips

     Motherhood may cause you to begin enjoying beverages that contain high levels of stain causing ingredients - like coffee, energy drinks and um, well, wine. You may notice your teeth beginning to look more like “ecru” than “white.” Also, many of these helpful beverages are rather addictive, especially coffee, so even after your little one is sleeping well, etc. you may still choose to partake of them. So, just start early on with the upkeep of your sparkly white teeth and enjoy your early morning beverage or late night treat.

So, that is all. I hope you’ll still invite me to your baby shower!!  (And, would you mind serving coffee??)

Yes, I am in fact, alive.

It’s been a very crazy week. I morphed into a working women after one swift interview and data entry exam at Manpower. I planned 5 crock pot meals, did every stitch of laundry, cleaned the house, and ironed my two pairs of dress pants. On Monday, I crept, very self-consciously, into the office and began this new phase of life.

We decided over the Christmas break that there is a need for me to work some this semester. We need to recoup from the monster that was 2009, as well as prepare for the hit we plan to take on the sale of our house in Madison. Our lovely renters have allowed us to place it back on the market while they live there – bless them!! We hope it sells soon, but we will lose money on it for certain, and should it not sell, and remain vacant, we’ll need to be ready for 2 house payments.

I absolutely can not miss summer break with the kids, so I’m working for Manpower. Ben and I can decide, week-to-week, if we can swing taking on an assignment. My first one went very well. Apparently, I am the fastest file consolidator in the Midwest. Can you believe this power has surged through my veins all these years completely untapped??

So, honestly, the week went surprisingly well. I cried and complained a lot on Monday morning. But, walking out the doors on Friday, I realized there were several thing I enjoyed about the week.

1. Structure

As much as I hate being tied to a schedule, I thrive on it. Knowing there was less time to get everything done forced us all to work together as a team and be more proactive around the house.

2. The lunch hour

An entire hour to sit in a break room and read a novel… Bliss. Pure bliss.

3. Corner office.

I had my own office!!! I could do my work completely independently and with minimal supervision. I enjoyed figuring out the most efficient way to get the job done. And, my lovely fake black leather chair was so amazingly comfortable.

4. Saturday morning

This morning was so wonderful. We didn’t see the alarm. We slept in. I put on JEANS and slippers and they felt so luxurious. Such a change from hose and ironed blouses.

5. Temp. work

So nice to know that because next week is especially busy, I can say no, which I did. I have another assignment in two weeks for the company I worked for this past week. They just couldn’t let go of my mad filing skills. Yes. I am so awesome.

Tee Hee.

So, now you know where I’ve been. This is complete blog suicide, I know. But I know this little blog will survive, because I have the best readers in the world. (That’s you!)

Thank you for checking in. If you think to pray for us, would you please pray 6006 Raymond Rd. becomes home for some OTHER nice family ASAP? Thank you, friend.

Hiding

Why am I not blogging? Well, I’m hiding a bit. The earthquake in Haiti covers everything I feel like saying in dust and rubble and chaos and grief. I sincerely wish there were cultural ways we expressed sympathy and concern that are unrelated to money. Of course we should give and pray. But, wouldn’t it be wonderful if we also all wore black, or cut our hair off, or ate only rice, for some sort of allotted amount of time – as an entire country? It would help me so much to take up some sort of activity or observance in the face of these things.

The Kneeler

I’ve always loved kneelers in church. I have almost never taken advantage of them. I guess it has something to do with my preference for disappearing at church. Not literally, of course. What I mean is, I like to worship with all the people, and all the wonderful music, but I like to feel like I’m there all alone. Poor Ben. I have to tune him out too. I like to pretend it’s just me and God. There is certainly a time for the community aspect of church. But during the worship music especially, I like to be in the zone. So, I’ve never gone up and used the kneelers at the front of our church because then people might see me. (I know, this is all in my mind. But humor me.)

Well, today, I just really, really, wanted to go and ask God for something. I knew I could do it in my seat. I knew there was nothing magical about asking for it up at the kneeler. But  I know, when He gives me this, and I remember back to when I asked Him for it, I’ll want to have the kneeler there in the memory because I’ll be remembering it over and over.  I asked for THAT kind of thing, you know? So, I went up.

It was nice. It wasn’t magical, but it was memorable. I think God enjoyed my embarrassment. I even think He might have laughed at me because I tried to get to the kneeler in a sneaky way. Ha Ha on me, I know.

W…w…w…waaaaaaait. No. OK. Go ahead.

I know I talk a lot about our home in terms of “open” and “closed.” Well, tomorrow is the big day for us. Tomorrow the house is officially “open” for the semester. Tomorrow we welcome our friend, Howard who will be staying with us for a spell – and then this weekend students will return and meetings and commitments will begin.

I think my heart is ready. I miss the students. Honestly and truly, I miss them.

But, my flesh is not ready. I’m a little tired. The house is still in some sort of funky disarray. The laundry is just not leaving. The girl’s room is in shambles. I don’t feel like cooking. I’ve been wearing the same pair of jeans for 4 days now.

Five years ago, OK, last year, I would have panicked at this point, over-analyzing my weakness and failures as a mom, homemaker, and disciplemaker… I can just hear myself…   “We can’t open our home in THIS condition. It’s not perfect. This mess makes me feel vulnerable and exposed. I need to hide behind perfectly buttery dinner rolls and shiny bathroom fixtures. Quick! Where is the 409!!!”

I don’t feel that way this year. I feel ready to let Howard see me with my hair up and my ratty robe on.  I feel like I can admit to him and the world that I like to veg out and watch Bernie Mac on TV after the kids go to bed. I feel OK about the mess. I feel honest and real. I feel like God is still going to do amazing things even if we aren’t perfect for Howard, or the students.

I think this is a step in the right direction for me. I think I’m, gulp, growing.

And, just one more thing friends. The doors are open. Why don’t you come? Really.

$13 worth of bliss

Do you have $13? Well, if you do, may I humbly suggest you use those $13 to buy one of these for someone you love? My  friend will not make buckets and buckets of profit if you do, but maybe just enough to bless her family with a night out, or a new outfit to make her feel cute, or put a down payment on the new furnace they need. Anyway, all that to say, I can guarantee all profits will go to a very lovely family. Money very well spent!

Sad, sad, sad…

I really need to find another piano instructor. Left to my own devices I only play songs marked “Lento” or “Grave” or are entitled “Ode to Something Terribly Sad.” I also use the damper pedal on every single song. Basically, I can make “The Entertainer” sound like a funeral dirge for some lost love.